Fly of Despair

Here’s a little something I put together for my Media Studio: Imaging final. It’s pretty buggy, looks terrible on phone screens, and will make your browser poop itself if you scroll too far down the rabbit hole–but I’m backing down from optimizing it for now because it’s already pretty entertaining. I hope that you get a kick out of it and that the theme isn’t too hard to discern.

How much do you want Squidward to suffer?

I have Rachel Smith to thank for much of the code; namely animating Squidward and the fake posts using CSS.

The original project this was based on, a piece of ‘net art’ in which I wrote JavaScript to parse an XML file for the same 5 post data forever whenever the bottom of the page is reached, was solely a style-for-style ripoff of Facebook’s homepage. Before settling on the page’s current functionality, I’d toyed with the ideas of randomly inserting Zalgo text the farther the user scrolls, or a similar effect with faces that appear in the images. My scattered college student brain did not make adequate time for those things.

Future features

One day (probably when the page disappears upon graduation) I’ll implement this in such a way that doesn’t eat so much processing power, perhaps with linear interpolation.

In short, there’s effectively no difference between mindlessly scrolling through sensational “news” and falling through a surrealist nightmare.

Andrew Aquino

Andrew Aquino

Frontend developer + UX designer

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